In January 2011 I got a call from a lawyer.
He told me he phoned my Toronto Hypnosis Clinic because he needed help with putting some structure into his life.
Little did I know - at the time of our phone conversation - how absolutely business-disabling his problem was.
Only after our initial interview session it became clear to me what kind of challenge I entered and what would be required to correct his business-disabling pattern of behavior.
Our work at the Toronto Hypnosis Clinic was very successful and I asked him for his testimonial.
His response was not unexpected.
Here is what he said in his email:
”Thank you for all the help you've provided to me over the last month.
I think it would be a good time for me to try continuing to maintain my schedule without you calling me... Somewhat like removing the training wheels from a bicycle.
This would allow me to prove to myself that I can maintain my new behavior without external help. If I fail miserably, I may at that time consider retaining your services once again so that I can get back on track.
I would be more than willing to allow you to draft a testimonial for my review that you may use it for marketing purposes. However, due to the public nature of my work, I would not be able to allow the use of my name (other than first and last initials) or the use of a photograph.
The first thing people do these days when considering using a lawyer is search for information about the lawyer on the internet. Since people are hoping to find the "best" lawyer they can for their given budget, I believe that for most people the idea of a lawyer getting psychological counseling or even "success" counseling works against the desired perception of the lawyer being the "best" lawyer. I hope you can appreciate my predicament with regards to this.
I sincerely do appreciate all the help you've provided me and am thankful that we have had the opportunity to have gotten to know each other.
I am expecting that we will be keeping in touch from time to time throughout the future to see how we are doing.
All the best,
What the above presented email reflects has plagued my Toronto Hypnosis practice from the very beginning.
Even though I’ve been very successful with most of my clients, only a few would refer their friends, or give me full-value-testimonials with their pictures and names attached.
I do understand why this pattern is so pervasive.
People do not want to put their weakness on display.
Another thing is that hypnosis is still very poorly understood by the general public, and most of the clients of my Toronto Hypnosis Clinic are afraid to share their experiences with others, because they fear being perceived as some weirdos who need to have their heads examined.
What my client had brought to the Toronto Hypnosis Clinic was a story of self-sabotage taken to its limits.
His story was a story of a greatly intelligent man who used all his intelligence to create a business set-up that would satisfy his profound subconscious need for living a totally unstructured life.
His problem was that - as much as he was successful in creating such a business structure - the structure he created was yielding only the ends-meeting income.
I have seen other business owners during the years of my Toronto Hypnosis Clinic operation, who self-sabotaged their need to succeed financially in business in order to fulfill some other need deeply entrenched in their psyche.
My client would come to his office sometimes at noon, sometimes in the evening, heavily relying on his office clerk who was payed very good money to basically handle all the business, limiting my client’s duty mainly to placing signatures on various pieces of paper.
Throughout the years of my Toronto hypnosis practice I’ve seen quite a few business owners suffering from the peculiar conflict between their business needs and the needs of their personalities.
My Toronto hypnosis practice has taught me that such conflicts can take the most bizarre forms which are capable of disabling even the most serious business operations.
They drive many very intelligent people nuts, just as the inner conflict experienced by my client drove him crazy.
After years of living in the state of conflict between his conscious desires and his subconscious, derailing him forces, he finally came to the point of desperation.
When he called my Toronto Hypnosis Clinic, he said that he was very highly motivated to put an and to his insane pattern of behavior.
He wanted to be able to go to bed at 10 p.m. instead of 5 a.m. and be able to come to his office in the morning instead at noon or some late afternoon or an evening hour.
After our initial interview session was over I asked him what he thought was necessary to enable him to make a substantial profit from his operation, rather than running it just at the ends-meeting, minimum effort level.
He said that he would have to start calling his prospective clients.
He had a large list of potential clients but was never able to discipline himself to start calling his prospects on a regular basis.
I told him that the years of my Toronto Hypnosis practice have taught me that a problem like his was usually best resolved via an intervention which superficially looked nonsensical, but which typically generated results far beyond anybody’s wildest expectations.
Not to many people realize how incredibly powerful is a therapeutic strategy which operates under the name of ORDEAL or BEHAVIORAL PRESCRIPTION.
I told my client that one of the most successful hypnotists in the world - Milton H. Erickson - frequently used behavioral prescriptions with great success as he worked with his clients.
I said that I’ve been also using behavioral prescriptions in my Toronto hypnosis practice, and that I thought that his case would really benefit from something that on the surface looked incredibly simple, and yet was capable of creating a profound inner transformation.
I told him that all he would have to do in order to overcome his insane pattern of behavior wold be to subject himself to another form of insanity.
As a homeopathic doctor, I told him that my proposed solution would work on his psyche in a homeopathic fashion.
I told him that in my Toronto hypnosis practice I frequently use a very powerful psycho-homeopathic approach - of like cures like - via which I help my clients to neutralize one form of their insanity by helping them engage in some other form of insanity - with premeditation - implying a total conscious control of the process.
This approach works beautifully not only because it employes the powerful homeopathic principle but also because it enables my clients to enter into a state of conscious control of their insane behaviors.
True, they are invited to behave insanely on purpose, but this is usually the first time in their lives that they are totally in control of their insanity.
As they they subject themselves to such a procedure their subconscious minds begin learning something new.
They begin learning that their insanity can be placed under their conscious control and that it is all that is required to take control of any form of life-crippling insane form of behavior.
It was still during my client’s first visit to the Toronto Hypnosis Clinic, that I laid down before him a very simple plan capable of restoring him to his so much desired business profitability.
I proposed to him that he shows up in my Toronto Hypnosis Clinic office at 9 a.m. on a regular basis for the sole purpose of calling his prospective clients.
Upon hearing my proposal my client looked into my eyes with incredulity and said: ”You mean... You want me to just sit here and call my prospects and pay you your fee while you basically do nothing?”
I replied that this was exactly what I had in mind and that my long years of practice at the Toronto Hypnosis Clinic have taught me that in cases similar to his, such very simple and seemingly insane approaches worked incredibly well.
Eventually my client agreed to embark on the exercise in insanity, which I proposed to him knowing that it could really turn his whole life around.
He was able to understand how profoundly different it would be, if he subjected himself to working under strict supervision rather than on his own, most likely following his undisciplined pattern of behavior.
He also agreed to some details of our mutual agreement.
I told him that the whole ordeal was meant to retrain his subconscious mind via an imposed, consciously chosen form of behavior, and that I would not tolerate any deviations from our agreement.
I told him that if he arrived even one minute late he would have to pay me double, and that if he missed even one day I would dump him as my client.
He agreed to the terms of our agreement.
The next day he showed up at my Toronto Hypnosis Clinic office - his face showing terrible psychic pain resulting from going against the grain of his unstructured-living-oriented personality.
He told me that having stayed up till the early hours of the morning, he had slept only one hour, an wasn’t even able to take shower, as he couldn’t afford to be late for our 9 a.m. appointment.
It took him about couple of hours to call ten prospective clients and at the and of the session he was greatly inspired by his simple and yet very significant achievement.
As he was calling his prospects I was sitting nearby reading a book and listening to his phone conversations.
After three days of this therapeutic insanity, I said to my client:
”Look... What you are doing here is rather insane. Do you think you could start calling tomorrow from your office, rather than making your calls from here, paying me as I read a book and entertain myself by listening to your marketing conversations?”
He said he though he could do it but would prefer to call from his home office.
I told him that in order to secure the success of our therapeutic engagement I would have to call him every morning at 9 a.m. just to check if he was really performing his duty.
I also told him that if he really wanted to succeed he would have to be brutally honest with me.
He would have to tell me what he was really doing regardless whether or not he was actually calling his prospective clients.
"In the end" - I told him - "If you lied to me, you would still be paying for my calls and the whole thing would really make no sense at all."
My client said that he understood what I was saying and the second stage of our engagement became a reality.
He knew that my calls would force him to be up in the morning, and that he could not afford to fail to maintain his early getting up and working routine if he wanted me to continue working with him.
At this point my client completed three days of doing something which he had never done before in his whole life - namely, not only calling his prospects, but calling them in a disciplined manner for three days in a row.
He was greatly encouraged by his accomplishment.
Soon, my client was through his first week of his disciplined getting up early and marketing his legal services.
He was absolutely elated!
He had never done such a thing during his whole life.
He was also very aware that his achievement was possible mainly via the power of the relationship which we mutually developed.
The foundational basis of our relationship was simple.
I was demanding from him a particular form of behavior and he was delivering what I demanded.
Simply, by placing myself in his life in a way which would not tolerate his former discipline-lacking dysfunctionality, I was able to help him to rise to the heights of his new, never previously possible functionality.
Such is the power of what goes by the name of a THERAPEUTIC RELATIONSHIP.
The years of my Toronto hypnosis practice have taught me that indeed the greatest power, capable of undoing even the most difficult human problems, lies in the strength of a therapeutic relationship.
Essentially, it is the connection - the relationship - that heals and everything else is but a decoration.
I kept on calling my client every morning for 30 days and that was enough to teach his psychological system that indeed a very different way of functioning in life was a reality.
Sometimes the simplest solutions yield the greatest results.
I never cease to marvel at how insane we all are as a human race and how simple our way out can be from various forms of life crippling insanity.